Thursday, May 31, 2012


I use to be a very nice person.  Then I was shocked to find out being nice did not mean you were humble.  I was one of the most self righteous persons I knew.

Someone once said being humble is not thinking you are worse than you are or thinking your are better than you are.  It is about not thinking of yourself at all.  Others have said it is thinking rightly about yourself.  You who you are a child of the King.  Loved.  Delighted in Cherished.  Blessed. Valued.  Saved, righteous, forgiven, and on and on.

Humility is a trate God has to work in your life.  You can pray to be humbled.  It is a very courageous prayer because it usually means being stripped of all your self sufficiency, arrogance, independence, pride.  But oh when you reach that place of depending on God and not yourself there is no better joy.


Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass.  It is about learning to dance in the rain.  unknown.  I know what it is to dance in the rain.  Wonderful!

Tuesday, May 29, 2012


One sin I have always hated is gossip.  Maybe it is because I have always been in the public eye.  The topic of conversation true, false, good bad.  So many times it was so hurtful to me because it was about my family and those I loved most.  We had people peeping over out back fence taking pictures.  The police would come to my door late at night and someone had told them one of my children had been down town.  We even had a cross burned in our front yard.

A wise woman once told me to repeat something about someone even if it was true, if it was harmful was gossip.  That people did that to make themselves feel better about themselves.  I learned something from all of this if what I said could not build someone up instead of tare them down I shouldn't say it.

Christ was the center of gossip.  Pleople told lies about Him.  He always confronted them with the truth.  He is the Son of God who came to save the world.  I believe He hates the damage gossip does to peoples lives.  He loves His body and wants us to build each other up.

Monday, May 28, 2012

Honor and Remember

One of my most favorite times with my dad before he died was talking to him about serving our country.  He did everything from jumping out of airplanes to working in the soup kitchen.  He talk about that time with joy, pain and thankfulness to have had the experience of serving his country.

Desperate Delight and Whispers want to take this time to honor and remember those who serve and have  served our country for our freedom.  May we never forget them nor take them for granted.  Lets remember those who have lost loved ones.  Their families and loved ones.  I want to pray for those who return to our country.  May their lives prosper and be complete as they pick up life here again.  May they have favor with man and I know with God.

To me wars are a picture of the spiritual battle we are in with evil.  God has defeated Satan at the cross.  The victory has been won for us.  To have intimate relationship and respect with God Almighty. May we live in that freedom and love of our God.  Who sent His one and only Son that the oppressed and captives maybe set free.  I pray we are thankful for all our freedom and those who fought to make it possible.  Thank you soldiers.  Thank you Jesus.  Our hearts overflow with gratitude  and remembrance of you.

Saturday, May 26, 2012

Deep Ache

Last night I was sitting on my porch.  It was moon lit and quiet but the critters of the farm.  Family was gone and friends were busy.  My heart and mind was quiet.  I noticed a deep ache and loneliness in my heart.  I knew it was the loneliness that only God could fill.  It is a gift from God to me to know when I need to draw away and just be with Him.  I can walk with Him and pray without ceasing but it is different than quiet communion and fellowship just me and God alone in His presence.  Listening for a still small voice in my heart.  Whispering to my soul reassurance and love like none other can provide.

Soon I said simple prayers like fill me Lord.  Give me your peace.  Then I confessed how I had filled my heart with idols, without realizing it, to try to fill the void. I shared my burdens one by one.   My heart turned to thanksgiving for all God had given me and who He is.  Worship flowed from my fulfilled heart. Once again the beauty of His presence was enveloping me.  I was at peace and rest and renewed in my Savior and Fathers arms by Their Spirit.  I felt complete and loved.  The more sensitive I am to the Spirit the more I search and am drawn into Gods presence.

Friday, May 25, 2012

Pleasing God

One of the things I have struggled with since I was a little girl was wanting the approval of men.  That is how I got my value if others approved of me.  I think I have grown a lot in this area.  Realizing my audience is God Almighty.  That He approves of me already.  That I chose to please Him and not men.  This is to the extreme where you want to please men instead of God.  I never thought of it that way but scripture says if you are a pleaser of men you cannot please God.

The trap this makes me fall into is comparing myself with others.  You know I can't do that as well as my friends.  I wish I had the talents and gifts she had.  I wish my relationship with the Lord was as close as hers.  This is a never ending spiral and we are unique in ourselves.  We cannot compare ourselves to others because we each have special gifts and talents.  I think one of the hardest things has been for me to accept myself as God does.  He has created me in His image and adores me and that is what matters.  If He is pleased with His creation who am I to question His work.

Thursday, May 24, 2012


Several years ago I broke my wrist in three places.  I went to the doctor and he set it and put a cast on it.  It took it longer than usual to heal but it did heal.  There are times now though it will ache.

It is a different kind of wound but the majority of us have had a wounded heart.  Nothing will help but going to the Great Physician.  Only He can mend a broken heart.  It too takes time and may ache for a long time to come but He does promise healing.  His love is the medicine that must be applied over and over.

It may take others praying over you and even helping you cut into the infected heart.  It can be extremely painful.  The lancing of the heart brings poison to the surface that may have aded in addictions, trouble relationships, dysfunctions from work to how you are able to enjoy God and others.  It is not an excuse for these things but it is to understand the root of where they may stem from.

God does not condemn but He does want complete healing for us and the ones we know and love.  It is a promise.  He wants redemption for us.  Only He can make things right.  God draws near to the broken and contrite heart.  He is drawing you near to Him for a miracle.  He wants to heal you so you can love in the best possible way.

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

I Know He Watches Me

The sky darkened, the thunder roared.  The winds began to pick up speed.  The limbs on the trees swayed in different directions as if they had a mind and personality of their own.  They were securely planted with the roots of the trees that went deep within the ground. Unlike the sparrow.  I noticed a tiny sparrow perched right outside my screen porch.  It was totally still but its head moved from side to side in fright.  Watching all the action of creation take place but looked as if it wondered where to go and what to do.

I though how many times have I been like that tiny sparrow frightened in my circumstances.  But scripture says that our God even cares for the sparrow.  How much more does He care for me.  The song says His eyes are on the sparrow I know He watches over me.  Gods words tells us not one of the sparrows are forgotten. For us not to fear; we are more valuable than the sparrow.

Luke 12:6-7

New American Standard Bible (NASB)
Are not five sparrows sold for two [a]cents? Yet not one of them is forgotten before God.  Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Do not fear; you are more valuable than many sparrows.

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Purpose for Living

A friend told me once I don't know the purpose of this life.  What is my reason for being here.

The little book Jesus lives explains that we have value because of Gods love for us.  Long before we sought God, He had designs on us for glorious living.  She says that Gods overall purpose embraces and enfold us.  Helping us to understand who we are and accepting ourselves.  In God we live and move and have being.  Even before the creation God gave us purpose.  To be the focus of His love.  For holy living and to be made whole.  His love completes us.  With His loving presence we become aware of His purposes for our lives.

 Although we are not valued because of our work He has predestined things for us to accomplish before time.  Don't let Satan discourage you or question your motives.  Your heart tells you of your calling.  Delight in God as you do these works with confidence that God has called you.

John Piper says God is most glorified in us when we most enjoy Him. No Matter what our circumstances. Our calling is to delight in Him and His presence and give Him glory.

Sunday, May 20, 2012

By Her Side

Have you watched someone you love dearly suffer.  I mean they have hit bottom and you thought it could get no worse for them.   I have someone in my life right now like this.  My daughter.  At her daughters birth she had twins and lost one.  Her body went through some great changes and she ended up taking ambein to try to sleep.  It was a long slow process and we were too far to realize what was happening and uneducated but she got addicted to the sleeping aid.  Years later we found out she was bi-polar.  She and her family stayed with us off and on over they years trying to get her well from her self medicating herself.  She was doing the best she could but just could not lick the addiction.

Since then she struggled with the consequences despite all the help we could give her.  She now is fighting for the best for her children and is in a divorce.  We are doing all we can to help but mostly she is doing this on her own.  We can only do so much.   She is finding out dependence on God and the strength He is giving her.  She is a recovering addict who is licking the addiction and living to pass on what she knows and learned to others.  She is an amazing woman.   God has been by her side all the time through it all.  She is on just the right amount of medication with excellent help from a professional who is very wise.

She read to me from another recovering addict that sometimes we have to go where we have been to be who we are suppose to be.  I think this is true of my daughter and of me.  Gods grace is all over her.  She will have her own amazing story to tell for Gods glory.  She finally knows who she is and likes herself.

Would you please pray for her and her children.  They are precious and we love them dearly.  It is just so very hard for them all.  Thank you so much and may God bless you each and every one.  If my husband and I could have taken this on ourselves instead of her and her children we would have.  You know I think that is how the Father felt.  But only Jesus could suffer for us on our behalf.  What pain the Father must have felt seeing His only Son going through such suffering for us.  What love has been bestowed upon us by them both.

Saturday, May 19, 2012

The Wedding Party

There were times I was so sick and on so much medicine I couldn't get out of bed.  I would call my friends to come pray with me and walk.  I would drag myself over to the gymn even when I got better.  A friend coached me just to get me moving.

This week I have worked like I use to before I got sick.  I volunteered two days and loved doing it.  Then I worked in my house for a dear friends wedding party.  It has been just joy getting ready and planning.  I anticipate the fun we will have and the joy it will bring her.  I could not have done it without this anticipation and without God.

I thought this is just a taste of how He feels getting ready for our wedding feast we will have with Him and the body of Christ when we all gather in heaven.  What a wonderful time it will be and what joy we will share.  There will be great things He will do and show us.  Can you imagine?  Can you wait?

Friday, May 18, 2012

The Breath of God Within Us

The Breath of God Within Us 

When we speak about the Holy Spirit, we speak about the breath of God, breathing in us.  The Greek word for "spirit" is pneuma, which means "breath."  We are seldom aware of our breathing.  It is so essential for life that we only think about it when something is wrong with it.

The Spirit of God is like our breath.  God's spirit is more intimate to us than we are to ourselves.  We might not often be aware of it, but without it we cannot live a "spiritual life."   It is the Holy Spirit of God who prays in us, who offers us the gifts of love, forgiveness, kindness, goodness, gentleness, peace, and joy.  It is the Holy Spirit who offers us the life that death cannot destroy.  Let us always pray:  "Come, Holy Spirit, come."

- Henri J. M. Nouwen  

Wonderful Place

What was a wonderful place for you to be in yesterday, may not be where you should be today.  Following your heart and the leading of the Spirit can mean change.

Several weeks ago I started a new medicine.  I have had a lot of positive things happen as a result of taking it.  I don't have the side effects health wise that I did with the other medicine.  Plus I have a lot more energy.  Don't struggle with intrusive thoughts.

But I have also noticed I don't have the creativity I had in writing.  This has come the same time I got on the medicine.  I don't know what God is doing or where He is leading.  I am seeking His will and waiting.

I have a friend who is writing on Desperate Delight Facebook.  I would love for you to visit and enjoy her writing.

Thursday, May 17, 2012

I Can See Clearly Now

Have you had a project and started out full speed ahead.  Then it was like you hit a brick wall.  Energy and motivation seem to go with being overwhelmed.  Having no where to start again.  Elizabeth Elliott says to just do the next thing.   It really works.  I pray Lord show me what is the next thing to do and please give me your strength to do it.  Somehow I get beyond the pile and begin to see clearly.

Wednesday, May 16, 2012


While I was in AA for a year I learned some important lessons from these humble people.  Most of the old timers began their day on their knees praying thy kingdom come thy will be done.  The importance of surrendering daily was taught to me.  When you struggle one thing you cannot afford is not to have peace.  That comes from accepting and trusting in brokenness the one who all things are sifted through His fingers of love.  That you are not in control really God is.

Lord I surrender this day and all that I am to you.  You are my God and I am your child.  I trust you with my life.  Your will for mine.  I know you know what is best for me and for your glory.  Thank you for the peace that passeth all understanding when I am surrendered to your will.

Lord if there are things I cannot surrender to you I ask you work in my heart to make me willing.  The more you learn to surrender the easier it becomes to trust your Heavenly Father.

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Our Nature

By nature we are a very self centered people.  Through following Christ we learn to die to our desires that might conflict with God.  We must decrease that He might increase.  That doesn't mean we give up being who we are.  If anything we become more who we are truly in Christ.  We learn to accept ourselves.  Give of ourself to others and learn to receive.  Which sometimes can be the hardest of things to do.

The more we know Gods love for us the more we want to please God rather than wanting the approval of man.  We learn to say no.  We learn to take care of ourselves.  Not in a selfish way but in a Godly way.  We cannot care for others if we don't care for ourselves.

One of the most important things we can do is allow ourselves time to be alone with God.  To meditate.  Maybe journal.  Fast Pray.  What God puts on our heart to be with Him.  Maybe it is just to be still and listen for the quiet or that still small voice.

Surprised by Grace

Things have been pretty hard for a while for my family.  I was to start a new volunteer job yesterday.  And I did start.  I was full of fear and dread not knowing what to expect.  To my great joy the people were wonderful and I was so happy doing the things they ask me to do.

God wants to give us good gifts.  I wasted all that time in fear.  Everything the Father has is ours because we belong to Jesus.  Even the hard stuff is a plan for good.  God is good all the time and loves us beyond words.  As He loves Jesus. Instead of expecting the worse we should expect good gifts. I believe it pleases the Father to give us good things.   Anticipate to be surprised by Grace.

John 16:15  All things whatever the Father has are mine;
therefore I said that he takes of mine, and will declare it to you.

Saturday, May 12, 2012

Need Grace

I don't know why but I am really mentally tired right now.  I have a lot of family around so I am going to take a couple of more days off from posting.  Would love to hear from you.  I will be praying for you.  Thanks for the Grace.  Hope to be back Monday.

Thursday, May 10, 2012

The Bride of Christ

In Scripture we christians are referred to as the bride of Christ.  We make up one body.  We all need each other.  If you don't have a fellowship who is nonjudgemental and preaches the word of God the gospel, I so encourage you to find one.  They are to be found.  It may take a little time but once you have experienced relationship with the body of Christ you will see how very necessary each one is to you.

We need each other to speak into each others lives.  To see what we cannot see.  To point us to Jesus.  To spur one another to faith and good works.  To worship together.  To become more like Jesus as we let Him live His life through us.

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

The Gospel

TOTALLY LOVE THIS: If I wanted others to think highly of me, I would conceal the fact that a shameful slaughter of the perfect son of God was required that I might be saved. But when I stand at the foot of the Cross and am seen by others under the light of that Cross, I am left uncomfortably exposed before their eyes.

Indeed, the most humiliating gossip that could ever be whispered about me is blared from Golgotha’s hill; and my self-righteous reputation is left in ruins in the wake of its revelations. With the worst facts about me thus exposed to the view of others, I find myself feeling that I truly have nothing left to hide. -The Gospel Primer

Our Deepest Longing

Even though Abraham saw God provide the sacrifice and Abraham could get his son.  God told Abraham God was his great reward.  We think if we had possessions, power, relationships we would be content and it would fulfill us.  It doesn't meet our deepest longing.  Only God can meet the void within us.  As we run to Him He is our fulfillment our satisfaction.  On God will meet our deepest longing.

"You God, are my God, earnestly I seek you; I thirst for you, my whole being longs for you, in a dry and parched land where there is no water." Psalm 63:1, NIV

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

God is Awesome

When I am struggling and people are praying God has a way of touching my heart with His loving kindness.  It is amazing.  I am so thankful.  So happy.  It is a wonderful day and Jesus is awesome!
God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him in suffering.  John Piper.  That is where I want to be.

A Little Child

I was really struggling this morning.  Don't know if I was tired or just fearful and full of doubt.  Soon I have a couple of friends praying for me.  Reminded myself of the truth that I am secure in His arms, Abba Father.  That nothing can separate me from the love of God.  Got some good rest.  Focused by thoughts on the lovely, pure, righteous and holy and the things above.  It wasn't fixed in a moments time but I have found rest in God.  Rest in His finished work for me.  That He is in control.  I can trust Him above all else.

I am learning to be a little child again. To be free and enjoy the things of a child's heart. To rely on my Father.  Run to Him.  Trust Him and have my eyes fixed on Him.  There is no safer place to be for a child than in the arms of his parent.  This is the way it is suppose to be for us although not all of us had good experiences with our parents.  We have a Father now that will never fail.  Always working for your good.  Never leave us.  He is by our side loving and caring for His child, us.

Matthew 18:2-4

New American Standard Bible (NASB)
And He called a child to Himself and set him [a]before them,and said, “Truly I say to you, unless you [b]are converted andbecome like children, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven.Whoever then humbles himself as this child, he is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.

Monday, May 7, 2012

Heart of Pride

You can have dirt on your face and everyone can see it but you.  That is how pride can be.  Your heart can be full of pride and you not even know it.  Others can see it but you can't.  It alters everything you say and do.  You do not know it until the Spirit comes in and convicts you.  That is what happened to me this morning.  I am broken over it.

I have a contrite heart today and one full of joy.  That is why Christ came to forgive and to make right our prideful hearts.  I am restored and so thankful I am right again with my Lord and the world.  I have eyes to see and ears to heart the beauty of Christ and others.

A repentant heart brings about joy and peace and abundant life.  Doing penitence goes to feeling sorry for yourself and being beaten up.  A repentant heart has life.  A unrepentant heart has no life, no joy, no peace.  Ad repentant heart rest in the finished work of Christ and the love of the Fathers arms.  There is no rest for the unrepentant  heart.

Sunday, May 6, 2012

Theres going to be a Feast!

I am kind of sad tonight.  I don't know why.  No special reason.  Just melancholy.  I have so much to be thankful for.  Oh we have our problems like most but that is not the reason.  I think of the people that are suffering and the damage sin causes in the lives of people.  But that is when we turn to God in praise and worship for sending Jesus to make all things right.

We are to walk in holiness because of His righteousness He has given to us on the cross.  It is ours in every way.

I see myself dancing before the Lord in praise and worship.  Glory to God in the highest. My imagination of heaven is breath taking.  All the angels, saints, Christ in His righteousness and the Father God on the throne in all His glory.  What a beautiful picture.  Brighter than the sun more sparkle than a diamond.  Joyous singing and worshiping.  We all are joining together as the Bride of Christ.  There will be a grand feast for the wedding.  It will be breath taking.  All Gods creation will take part.  The sons and daughters of the Father all indwelled by the Spirit.

There they will be no more tears.  No thought of sin and the damage it has caused in peoples lives.  Only the redemption of our Lord.  We will spend eternity knowing Him and growing in relationship with our Savior.  What a magnificent time it will be.  We will all be united together and One with the Trinity.  There will be nothing lacking.  Nothing that is not holy and righteous and pure because of Christ.

Saturday, May 5, 2012

Equip the Unequipped

Have you ever looked at your handicaps as an asset?  What if God uses your suffering and sin to minister to others with the same suffering.  We would be able to comfort others with the same comfort we have.  Who would better understand and have compassion and truth that you with the same background.  Would knows better to minister to those in a wheel chair than Joni?  She knows the struggles and defeats as well as victories of those with the same handicap that she has.  At that point it becomes an asset.  God has equipped the unequipped.  He has worked a miracle for you and others.

Friday, May 4, 2012

Written on my Heart

The years I have spent in Gods word is still with me.  It is sharper than a two edged soared.  It convicts, builds up and guides.

When I am distressed or depressed Gods words comes back to me.  It serves me well.  The Lord has written it on my heart.  When I meditate on Gods word and His character to say it out loud increases our faith.  Meditate on it day and night.

When my thoughts are wayward I speak truth to myself.  It seems as it is a battle going on.  Gods truth always wins.  Resisted the Devil and flea from him and he will flea from you.  Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.

Gods word is Jesus.  He is rich and full and satisfying.   Be filled of the fountain of the words of God and His love for you.   He will speak to you through His word.

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

You Light Up My World

Light shines through the window pane into my darken room.  You are the light of the world.  Where you are there is no darkness.  To you light and dark are the same.  

You shine your light into my world, into my heart.  You are the light unto my path.  You lead me where to go, what to say.  Where would I be without you.  In a dark filled world.  But I have you to give me light and hope.  I lift my heart in praise.  My joy is complete when I am with you.  You make me happy.
I love being in your presence.  I trust in you Oh Father.  You Light up my world.

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

New Liberty

The cool Spring morning air comes into the room as worship music goes out of the room.  Doors and windows open.  You know God in new freedom and liberty.  You are freer to worship as the Spirit guides you.  Your heart sings and dances as your arms are lifted to worship the one and only true God.  Full of grace and mercy, joy runneth over your very being.

The things of this world grow dimmer now.  You are lifted higher above any circumstance that may trouble you.  Only your heart united with His is all that matters.  The Spirit guides you in worship and praise.  You are a little child at heart dancing in the love of your Father.