Phil 4:13 Whatever I have, wherever I am, I can make it through anything in the one who makes me who I am.
Many times I wanted to write. It was my plan to get better and then to write you and share with you the things I did to get better. Hoping to encourage you. But the truth is I am not better. If anything I have seen how much I need the prayers of the Saints and Jesus more than ever.
When you have struggled with your thought life over two decades I began to realize it is not as simple as I though just to change my thinking. Recently it was suggested to me to make a list of the lies and write the truth. This has been helpful bringing the truth and light to the lies. The bible speaks of taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ. Also keeping a file what the Bible says about what I might be struggling with in my mind. Along with daily claiming the promises of God.
The more I have worked on my thoughts more issues have unfolded. For example...All my life I have lived before the public eye. It has been a joy and a blessing but also a pressure on me that I did not realize. Many things can determine who we think God is and the thoughts that enter our mind. We do not have to be a slave to these determining factors but can be renewed in our mind of who God truly is and realize that our thinking can change. Eventhough not perfect.
It is a comfort to me that the God that created me in His image did not make a mistake in allowing these struggles to me. He told us we would have troubles. This is a broken world. So why are we surprised when suffering comes into our lives?
We need direction and truth. There are reasons the Bible speaks often about our thoughts, our mind, suffering, sadness, grieving and anxieties. Being downcast. David struggled in the Psalms.
Being sad or thinking wrong thinking does not mean that you are different than many in the Bible or in everyday life. Our thoughts can come from the world, the flesh, the enemy or ourselves. I have learned to send bad thoughts to the cross and let Jesus fight for me or forgive me if they are mine.
My granddaughter said in her testimony that being a Christian or taking a stand for Christ does not mean that difficult things will not happen but that Jesus will be with us through it. This is where I am. Still struggling but being so blessed that Jesus, Father and Spirit are with me to help me, protect me, forgives me and give me the assurance that Gods love for me never changes. My daughter also said Mom you cannot lose what you did not earn. My children and grands give me so much wisdom and for that I am thankful and blessed.
I have learned how God helps me in the day to day living of trusting Him and knowing that the cross is not just for salvation but for sanctification. Becoming more like Jesus. I have had to surrender to Jesus the life that I wanted for the life I have been given. Good, bad and indifferent.
My identity in Christ and as Gods child is my rock. It can never change or never be taken from me. This is the assurance of what Jesus assured us by His death and resurrection. He gave us His Spirit and His promises to help and encourage us. Along with the body of Christ, His gave us each other to help us in our journey. Finding a friend or two who you can share your story, your failures, your struggles, and know they love you enough to speak truth and hope to you. Someone who will not judge you because they have had their own story and need for Jesus. There is no false guilt or shame in these relationships or with God. I have been learning to reject this thinking and retrain my thoughts. Just training my mind to think...think of what life is doing and being mindful of God. Being in the present has also been a work and not to live in the past of regret.
Jesus suffered for the joy that was to come. So do I. Many days I chose joy and many days I look to the joy that will be to come...It is not only Jesus hope but ours.
Do Not lose hope...
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