Wednesday, February 26, 2014

Peace at all cost...

And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and mind in Christ Jesus

For the past month or so I have been coming off my old medication onto a new one.  Now I am on half of both, the old and the new.  The other day was a particularly hard day and I had lots to do that afternoon.  I prayed for grace all along the way and it was there for me, but it was really hard.  When I got home I just wanted peace.  Peace is one of my former idols of my heart.  I still seek it and did that day.  So I got the tulips I had bought at the grocery store and put them on my back porch.  I cleaned up a corner of my porch.  Got out my pillows from last summer and placed them around on my porch.  It was a gorgeous day and I just sat there in the beauty with Jesus.  I decided to take a picture and tweet it.  I was thinking nothing about it but many people responded how they would love to be with me and what a lovely place my porch was.  

This is similar to the picture I posted on twitter and Facebook.

It is lovely but this is how the rest of my porched looked and still looks today unless I decide I want to do something about it.

It is a mess.  It is dirty and has old dirty boots.  A little of Christmas is still out there and there is nothing arranged.  I thought if everyone could see how my porch really is they wouldn't think how beautiful it is.

This represents our lives to me.  We put our mask on and our best foot forward for others to see and we hide.  Since Adam and Eve we have hidden ourselves.  We compare to others and think what we have is not good enough or that we are not good enough.  To compare, we never measure up.  Someone always has it better than we do, they don't have the life and the struggles we do and we are on a slippery slope.

We do this through social media.  We get on blogs where people have perfect lives and homes and Facebook we see the parties and the happy events.  There is nothing wrong with this for entertainment or to present the gospel to each other but when it becomes a way of life it can be deadly.  It can suck the life out of us.  We spend more and more time there dreaming and escaping from our own hard life.  It is not reality and those relationships can't take the place of face to face life interacting with people.  It is removed from the hard stuff.  It is a dream.  We are seeking peace but there is no peace. We are seeking and longing for perfection that only heaven can give us.  We deaden our minds and hearts to life.  If we remove ourselves from lifes problems we also remove ourselves from lifes beauty and purpose.  I know I have done it.

I would get up and get on my computer and stay there for hours on end.  I was trying to find life and peace. I would avoid conflict at all cost and avoid any situation I could that I didn't already know how it would turn out.  I wouldn't enter into a conversation that I knew I could not win and could not fail.  I was silent a whole LOT!  I was isolated a lot.  You can be isolated in a room or house full of people.  Men do it through their work and hobbies and women through their work and children.  I know terrible but true.  We each have our own ways of removing ourselves from life, through addictions good and bad, many ways.  I was removing myself from a life I didn't want to live.  I couldn't face the disappointment and the fear that my everyday brought.  I couldn't face my failure.  I was a perfectionist that was frozen for fear of failure.  "Imperfection is the only prerequisite for grace. Light only gets in through the cracks." Philip Yancey The gospel calls us to live, to fail to forgive and be forgiven.  We are told that we can have peace and have it abundantly.  It is all of grace, amazing and abundant grace.

Peace is not found in our circumstances or in other people. It is not found in escaping trouble or conflict.  Peace is found in trusting God and that He is in control of our lives.  That He is about something good even when we cannot see it.  That He is working in the lives of those around us and in us.  He calls us to move out of our comfort zones, the world we can try to control and to risk failure and conflict and beauty and success.  He calls us to be intentional in each others lives and to live life the fullest.  It is not always going to be easy or comfortable but He is there to empower us and comfort us.  He is our life.

Through relationship with Jesus, Father and Spirit we can know what true peace is.  When Jesus died on the cross for our sins He took Gods wrath that we deserve.  He made peace with God, the Father, for us.  So now we can go to Him without fear.  We can know we are dearly loved and cherished.  That He desires to lavish His love on us in more ways that we can ever begin to imagine.  He wants to reveal Himself to us in new and exciting ways through His creation, others and circumstances, through prayer and His word by His Spirit.  It is an exciting life He has planned for us.  Not to harm us but to prosper us.  It may not be the ways in which we think we need but through some of those losses is when we get to know Him in the most intimate and deepest ways.  It is a beautiful thing how He uses it all.  So if you want peace, Peace Himself dwells in you.  It is already there within your very being, your very soul.  The Father accepts you for who you really are, be that person.

Sunday, February 23, 2014

Why am I here?

1 Cor. 10:31 So, whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.

Do you ever wonder what your purpose in life is?  Do you ever think I am just not doing enough for the glory of God?  We are told.

The chief end of man is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever.

Do you wonder what does it mean to glorify God?  In the dictionary glorify means...celebrate, honor, applaud, praise, idealize, romanticize, worship, revere, thank, or to give thanks to.

We are told our purpose in life is to glorify God in all we do and to enjoy Him, no matter what it is we are doing.

In Chariots of Fire, Eric Liddell, was about to run his race and he received a note.  In it, the note said he that Honors Me, I will honor.  He waded up the note in his hand and then began to run with all his might.  Someone in the stands ask where does the power come from.  It was answered... it comes from within.  Eric said,

"I believe God made me for a purpose, but He also made me fast, and when I run I feel His pleasure."

Where do you feel Gods pleasure?  What has He gifted you to enjoy and do?  When I write I feel Gods pleasure.  Him flowing through me.  I am not a good writer by mans standards.  It is a gift God has given me from writing years of prayer letters.  One day some friends said, you should write for others to read.  This was about 15 years of writing prayer letters to my friends.  I never wrote before but God was giving me a gift.  Even a gift I could share.

I also love hiking.  I am not good at it.  I get afraid of the high places and the dangerous leaps and climbs.  But I love the gentle walks, I take with friends to beautiful waterfall absorbing God in His nature.  This time, we noticed mushrooms, and a curved tree hugging onto another one, stacks of slanted rocks that the water and time had worn down.  I sat at the top of the hill, just enjoying God and His beauty.  Just worshiping, enjoying Him and glorifying Him in my hike and then my rest.

My husband and my son enjoy God in their work.  My husband, a farmer and my son, a cowboy.  They are beyond just good at it, they are gifted and they enjoy God doing it.  My husband says he prays, as the rides for hours upon hours on that tractor.  My son enjoys God as the adrenaline runs through him, to do his best in those few seconds he has prepared and worked endless hours to perform.  He is a master and he gives glory to God in doing it and for it.

So whatever you do, do it in worship in glory to God.  It does not have to be a huge task.  It probably won't be.  It won't be huge, but God is, and that makes it worthy.  Whether you are walking your dog, putting in another load of clothes with your child on your hip, working one more overtime or sitting at home wishing you had a job.  Do it all to the glory of God.  Whether you are battling addiction or that troubling relationship, do it all to the glory of God.  Enjoy Him in the midst of the good times and the bad.  He is there with you through it all.

You might ask, how can we enjoy Him in the hard.  I see maybe enjoying Him in the good, the fun, the easy, but even the hard we need Jesus even more.  We need to enjoy Him even more.  This is the grace and the strength to carry on.  The fact that He is with us.  He knows the end already, and He is about only good, because He is good.  It may not look like we think it should.  Maybe not so good things are happening, He redeems it, brings good out of it.  Trust Him that He is in control and He has a plan and nothing can thwart that plan from happening.  Join Him in the good He is doing.  It is such a joy to be used with and of God.

Did you know God created worship for Him to be honored and adored and lifted up but it is also for us.  We were created to worship and why we will worship anything. We look to other things and people to give us only what God can give us.  But we were created to worship God.  When our heart is alined with the gospel our heart is toward worshiping the Lord.  Worship lifts us above our circumstances.  When you worship and cherish and are caught up in the praise of Him you are lifted to the throne of Grace with Him, by His side in the heavenly.  The circumstances don't seem so big any more.  You can see clearly to deal with things and people.  It is eye opening and heart changing.  It is where we are most happy.  "He that Honors Me, I will honor." We are to live a life of worship.  He is seeking those who will worship Him in Spirit and in Truth.

He has a purpose for you and it is to glorify Him and enjoy Him forever!

Friday, February 21, 2014

Spring just around the corner

Just after the cold hard freeze we all had there are hopes of Spring in our hearts.  Hopes of new life.  We think I want to be new and fresh and full of life.  I want to be full of hope that Jesus brings.  We are told...

Become the loving, kind, thoughtful, forgiving, compassionate person you want to be with. You can't? That is the beginning of faith. Let Jesus live His life through you. Lean into Him and rest in His finished work.   We think I cannot be this kind of person.  It is a start to realize this and to lean into the Fathers
arms not to let Him fix you but to be loved.  Love begets love.

Let all bitterness go from you. When you think of your hardship and how it came to you guard your heart says Rick Thomas. We can trust God with our struggles but do we trust Him with how they came about?

When you find yourself anxious and worried cast your cares on Him for He cares for you. Tell yourself the gospel. That Jesus said, "it is finished". Look to the cross and the finished work He did in forgiving you, loving you and giving you life.

These very hardships are the things He is allowing in your life to bring you into dependence on Him and not yourself. It is in the disappointments that what you are relying on and trusting in will be revealed, Rick Thomas paraphrased by me.  So do not despise your brokenness, Scotty Smith says. See it as a means of Gods grace to you. His way of working faith and trust in Him in your very life. He is bringing dry bones to faith and life. He is restoring the years the locus have eaten. He is redeeming, making all wrong things right in His time and in His way. Trust Him.

Keep your eyes focused on Him and what He has done and even yes what He has given you. You have an inheritance as a child of the King. Enjoy your gifts and give them back to Him in loving service to others. It is natural for us to want to give the love that has been so lavishly given to us.

God is amazing. Worship Him today and don't think of the undone things or the ways you have failed. Repent and confess quickly. Jack Miller said for every one look at your sin take 10 looks to Christ. You are forgiven. You are loved and adored. Live in the joy of the little child that trust His "Daddy" with everything. Enjoy life but when you are sad know it is ok. He is living in and with you and He feels and experiences that sadness with you.

I talked to my doctor this morning. I was on too much medication. I had not cut back. He is decreasing one while putting me on a new one. He said the reason I am sedated is because I am better. That he has to decrease my medication slowly so as not to relapse. To be patient and keep the course I will be off it soon.

But what I see is that God used all that for me to learn and be with Him. To learn to love better. To show me patience and perseverance and hope. I am growing and so are you. God is doing amazing things in us so keep the faith dear friend. God meets us right where we are and delights to do so.  I praise God for the death He has brought in my life, the unforgiveness, bitterness, anger, hatred to life of confessing my sin to love and forgiveness and compassion, tenderness, and gentleness by His mercy and grace.  These are things I could not do left to my own resources.  I am learning to love the way He has loved me and when I blow it confess it and lean into Him again as my righteousness.  Learning to press into Him and left Him live this life I can't live on my own but Him through me.  Learning to fix my eyes on His wonder and beauty and trust He will bring about His goodness and love in me to others.  This life of faith that says, "It is Finished".  I have already accomplished my work in you now go and live out of the finished work I did on the cross.

Wednesday, February 19, 2014

In the Potters Hands

But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us.

I went back to the Potters House today with some friends.  Just to show them around a little and let them meet Shannon.  I wanted them to hear of the wonderful stories Shannon has to tell of how the Potters House got started and how the Lord continues to meet all their needs.  While I was there I took some pictures of the potters wheel.

Scripture makes reference to us as the clay and the Lord as the Potter.  As I have made no bones about my struggles these last few days I began to ask myself...How pleased am I with the person God is making me to be.  Me with my limitations, moods and feelings.  With the things I struggle with from day to day.  I still have some hard situations in my life but I am trusting God with them and have much peace.  The fact of the matter is I have a wonderful marriage, children and God has been faithful, but still I was downcast.  We look to circumstances for our happiness but when our circumstances are good and we are troubled how do you explain a restlessness within?

It is a condition of our heart.  Jesus is our Peace.  Maybe our eyes have gotten on ourselves and we are evaluating how we think we are doing?  The world, the flesh and the devil have control of our conscience many times.  We are evaluating us by our performance, ministry, family or work.  We feel false guilt even.  We are controlled by our conscience.  Learning for the Spirit to be over our conscience is the way to freedom.  Actually freedom is the way to the Spirit.  You cannot be led by the Spirit if you have a heavy conscience full of condemnation and shame.  Controlled by others or what they think of you.  Christ died to give us a clean conscience so we might hear His voice.  He promises to direct us through out our lives.

The gospel tells us to confess our sins and that we are already forgiven past, present and future.  That we are valuable and chosen before the beginning of time.  That we have Gods favor and His love is actively awaiting us each morning as we arise.  But can we be up all the time?  Can we have joy even when things are troubling us or can we have peace no matter what our circumstances?  Yes we can.  Do we all the time..I don't.

I am learning to trust the Potter.  I am learning that He is molding me into the imagine of His Son.  I have a dear friend that every time it is cloudy or raining I pray for her, actually several of my friends are that way.  They know I love the rain and the cloudy days.  But their body chemistry is such it fights with days like that.  They even have an artificial light they use in the winter time.  What about when I am cloudy inside for no reason... is that ok?  Does Jesus, Father and Spirit meet me in my lamenting, in my sadness no matter what it maybe.  Absolutely!  The Psalms are full of writing of crying out to God in depression, desperation and sadness. Sometimes I think we are the closest to God in our desperation.  We know we need Him.

God meets us wherever we are.  He meets us in our struggles.  In our hard circumstances of life.  Dealing with difficult people.  In us thinking we are not who we want to be, when we think we should be over such a struggle surely by now.  He meets us wherever we are, no matter who we are.  All we have to do is to cry out to Him.  He created us to be the very person, have the personality and the features we have.  I am not saying don't try to change but to trust God with the changing.  There is a rest in the clay on that potter wheel.  It just rest there as the hands of the Potter shapes and forms a thing of beauty.  Did you notice the bottom wheel is where the Potters feet are placed in turning the wheel so the Potters hands are never off the clay.

So, do I accept that what God is doing in me is good?  Do I accept my failures and lack of doing the things I know I should do and not doing the things I know I should?  Do I accept me?  Created in the very image of God for His glory.  Do I trust He sees the good and beauty that He would make me by living in me and knows exactly what He is doing in my life and heart and the lives of those around me. He is making me into the image of His own Son, with life and love and laughter and even sadness dependent on Him for my very own life I live.  Do I see I am unique and dearly loved and delighted in, so much so, that He took this hopeless, worthless child and made me His own. I was but a poor slave, begging child who had no life and didn't know where to find it.  I was starved and malnourished, dying inside.  He brought me to the throne of God and gave me a seat at the banquet table and gave me good food to eat and a place in His kingdom.  He has given me gifts and talents and a personality and grace and mercy.  He has given me life Himself.  He gave His very Son to come and get me and bring me into the family of God. He has set me free. So even in my sadness, in my grey days, I can have a peace and a rest in the Potters Hands.  I can see His grace on display in me and my days...even the sad ones and I can be glad, that I make Him glad, by trusting Him and resting in the palm of His hand.

Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Psalms 139

If you get a chance read tonight before sleep.

Psalms 139

You have searched me, Lord,
    and you know me.
You know when I sit and when I rise;
    you perceive my thoughts from afar.
You discern my going out and my lying down;
    you are familiar with all my ways.
Before a word is on my tongue
    you, Lord, know it completely.
You hem me in behind and before,
    and you lay your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
    too lofty for me to attain.
Where can I go from your Spirit?
    Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
    if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
    if I settle on the far side of the sea,
10 even there your hand will guide me,
    your right hand will hold me fast.
11 If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me
    and the light become night around me,”
12 even the darkness will not be dark to you;
    the night will shine like the day,
    for darkness is as light to you.
13 For you created my inmost being;
    you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
    your works are wonderful,
    I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you
    when I was made in the secret place,
    when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
16 Your eyes saw my unformed body;
    all the days ordained for me were written in your book
    before one of them came to be.
17 How precious to me are your thoughts,[a] God!
    How vast is the sum of them!
18 Were I to count them,
    they would outnumber the grains of sand
    when I awake, I am still with you.
19 If only you, God, would slay the wicked!
    Away from me, you who are bloodthirsty!
20 They speak of you with evil intent;
    your adversaries misuse your name.
21 Do I not hate those who hate you, Lord,
    and abhor those who are in rebellion against you?
22 I have nothing but hatred for them;
    I count them my enemies.
23 Search me, God, and know my heart;
    test me and know my anxious thoughts.
24 See if there is any offensive way in me,
    and lead me in the way everlasting.


  1. Psalm 139:17 Or How amazing are your thoughts concerning me.

Monday, February 17, 2014

Breaking the rules...

Sometimes I write for you and sometimes I selfishly write for me. Hoping and praying it ministers to you, all along but it is a therapy for me at times. A prayer letter to God. Now is one of those times. I have already written today and don't need to post too much, some would say. I am breaking all the rules and going for it anyway.

Do you ever have a day when you feel like a failure. You begin to evaluate yourself...your wins and losses. Your successes and failures? I have fallen into that today. Comparing yourself to others? There is no life in that. I know better. You never quiet measure up or are enough. Comparison is the thief of joy. I don't need satan beating me up or any one else to confirm me. I am my own judge and the conviction is set...guilty as charged. I am a failure. I can't do anything right. I am not being used by God and have no strength just to get through my day. Do you ever hear these lies or is it just me sometimes?

Today is my second day of trying to catch up physically after what I did to myself this weekend. I hate it. But now in this state I am going to preach the gospel to myself. I am going to pray to God that He rescues and delivers me from this pit. Why are you down cast oh my soul.

My family is doing well. Some are struggling but that is life. I have no real issues in my life at this moment that I don't believe God is bigger. No things that are too troubling but I am down and out. It is not a particular thing that is bothering me. I am just low. Maybe slept too much, been inside, who knows what it is. It is what it is and I cannot analyze it. I am just down.

I was reading Spurgeon last evening. He was talking about no matter how weak and imperfect our love is to God, that our loving Him makes Him glad. How delightful is our love to Him. When we lay our head on His bosom we not only receive but we give Him great joy. When we gaze with love upon His all glorious face, you not only obtain comfort but impart delight to Him. Our praise, also give Him joy-not the song of the lips alone, but the melody of the heart's deep gratitude. Our gifts, too are very pleasant to Him, our time, talents and substance upon the altar, not for the value but our hearts. When we forgive our enemies and loved ones we make Christ glad. When we give to the poor, and He rejoices over saved souls. When we proclaim the gospel we are a sweet savor to Him;

So how can we be downcast when we make our Savior glad by our mere presence with Him. Somedays we just are and that is ok. He will meet us there. He will just sit with us and love us and take great joy in our presence and comfort our very souls with His love. It is ok not to be happy all the time. It is ok to be human. That is why we need Jesus, our Savior and King. So that is what I am going to just be for tonight. Just be...

Enjoy the ride...

Exodus 32:12 I know you by name and you have found favor with me.

Still I remember the day he told me and how I felt.  Danny said, I will be coaching the college all star game again this year.  I will be gone next week.  My heart sank.  I didn't tell him why I just began to talk about how bad the weather was to be the coming week.  

Then I let it out...I don't have a really good track record of being my myself.  I remembered back to the time he took our son to a National Roping in Colorado.  I was dead sick mentally by the time he got back.  It is not that I am afraid to be alone or get lonely.  I enjoy time by myself.  But I get introverted, introspective and obsessed over things.  What could I do this time for it to be different.

Danny explained to me that our son, Lee, who lives in another house on the farm would be here to take care of me.  My doctor has told me not to spend one whole day in the house alone and not getting out, if even I had to walk to the mail box.

The first day alone came and the snow was coming down hard.  I snuggled in and began to read, what I love doing.  I read nearly all day.  My mind was taxed and I knew at the end of the day I could not have another day like this, even though I enjoyed it so much.  I went to Lees and had dinner with he and Sarah, his finance.

The next day I decided I would do things that were physical.  I worked around the house doing clothes, dishes, cleaning the pantry, took a walk and again went to my sons.  I felt better and knew I was on the right track.  I began to feel sorry for intentional I have to be about my health.

The weekend came and I was full of energy.  Had much grace.  I went to lunch on Friday, had an appointment, went to the ball game with friends and family, then to dinner.  I have been trained for many months on how to set my limits for myself but paid no attention.  Saturday I went to lunch and  went with a friend for awhile.  Then Saturday night Danny and I went to a friends for dinner.  I had been up until 1:00 the night before and was into the night Saturday.  I had so wanted to go to lunch and Church with Danny on Sunday but woke up with a bad headache and slept through out the day.  I had not listened to the Spirit and had not done what I needed to do to take care of myself.

We had such fun with family and friends at the game.  More than I had ever had in the past.

Jordan, our grandson posing for me lol.

Jodan and our daughter Elizabeth at dinner after the game.

We had a great dinner with friends for valentines.

Sunday, I looked at the trophies on the wall and remembered...I remembered all I use to do before a game...Have dinner with the staff and their families, have recruits and their families to the house, make contact with the media so they might write a favorable article on Sunday, and many times have the team over to the house after a win.  That is if there wasn't traveling to an away game.  I knew no limits.  I came to a point of burnout over the years.

If I could speak to coaches wives today I would tell them you can't keep your husbands job for him.  Set back, love your husband and children and others and enjoy the ride.  It can be amazing.  Don't sweat the small not worry about tomorrow.  Today has enough troubles of it's own.  Tomorrow with take care of itself.

But now I have limits.  I had them then, before when Danny was coaching full time.  I just didn't know it.  Can I learn to accept my limits but at the same remember God has no limits.  Can I be more concerned with what it is God really wants me to do than pleasing people?  We went for the moon before, but now God has created the moon.  His limitlessness goes on and on and is evident in His creation. It is evident and proof in the cross that God is limitless in what He will and can do in and for us what He chooses.  He is amazing.  I may can do only a certain amount of things at a time now but the God of creation, the God who knows no limits lives in me and can accomplish so much with the little I have to offer.  All I can do is give Him myself.  Learn to enjoy the life and people He has given me and Him.  Love Him and others selflessly.  Learn to appreciate myself and accept me for me, knowing God has fearfully and wonderfully made me and He knows me and I have favor with Him.  That He loves me and can work wonders even in my limits because He knows none.  So here I am 64 learning what this life is all about.  Wanting God to use me and work in me His good pleasure.  Holly Gerth said, "Even our limitations can't stop the limitless God in us.  God knows you and has created you for a purpose and created good works before time to accomplish those in you.  So you can set back and you can enjoy the ride.

Thursday, February 13, 2014

A Fathers Child

A Fathers Child

So you are no longer a slave, but God’s child; and since you are his child, God has made you also an heir.

I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you.

Tonight, I went to my son's for dinner.  His finance, Sarah, cooked a wonderful Mexican meal for me, Lee and another couple.  These friends of his, ours, had their little daughter with them.  It was such fun.  She was into everything.  Her dad said, "she is nosey".  I commended well inquisitive huh, lol.  They were watching everything Maezzie did.  We all were.  She was going from one to another to get a love.  Her mom was feeding her and making sure Maezzie didn't get into anything that would hurt her in any way.  Their stories were consumed with Maezzie.  Funny stories.  We all were laughing and enjoying our time with this little one.  They were telling us her habits, her needs and even her weaknesses.  They know her inside and out.  I dare say better than little Maezzie knows herself.  But one thing is for sure, she is well taken care of by all, especially her parents, Ezzie and Nikki.  They spoke even of their discipline of her and how they had given this much thought and concern.  It was not like they had this child and they were just reacting to her, they were responding with much love and care.  Little Maezzie was a product of Ezzie and Nikki's love for one another.  She was cherished and adored.  She is beautiful.

As I have told this story, I want you to take this wonderful picture of Ezzie, as Maezzie's father and put your heavenly Father in his place and you in the child's.  If this wonderful, but human father and mother cares for their daughter in such intentional, intimate manner how much more does your Father in heaven care and adore you?  How He labors over His discipline and training of you.  How He is concerned for your Spiritual nourishment and rest in Him.  How we are a product of His love for Jesus.  It is a little different but the Father wanted children, a family and Jesus wanted a bride, the church, us.  We are a product of that love and determination to experience His love, his security and delight.

So many of us have not had good earthly parents, or Father, in which to picture God, our Father.  But I want you to know your father is not a picture of God as Father, but God is a picture of what your father should be or for that matter what you should be.  Some of us have never known our Father.  The Lord tells us He is our Father, especially to those who have no Father.  He will be a Father to fatherless.  Let Him love you in ways you never received here on earth, precious ways, tender and compassionate ways.  He wants to do that right now for you, I just know it.

I know I failed my children in many ways and they need Gods healing for them to mend their precious hearts.  No one could have tried harder than I did to be a good parent but we learn so much and parenting is all of Grace.  I didn't know that the Father was there to parent with us, me and Danny.  That Jesus could give us His love for them.  That the Spirit could guide us, empower us to do what we could not do.  That I needed to give them my heart.  It is only by Gods grace that my children have turned into the young, great adults they are today and I thank Him.

Sometimes we have to forgive our parents for their screw ups as a parent to us.  Sometimes there is healing that needs to take place, but there are scares.  By His strips we are healed.  Let Him heal you now, but don't despise your need, He may have used, to bring you to dependence and love for Him.  He felt your pain.  He was there with you.  You were not alone.   I believe He will show us His scares when we get to heaven.  He wants us to remember the greatest display of love that has ever happened, the cross.  He wants us to remember the horrendous sacrifice but the beauty in it all because of His love for us.  For God so loved us, He sent His One and Only Son to die, to come and get us to bring us into the family of God.  

Don't despise your need for Grace.  The Spirit wants to lavish it on you.  His love on you.  Thank you Father that you are our Father.  That you are such a great Father and love us more than we can think or imagine.  Your care for us is so unique and beautiful.  Heal the hurt and wounds Dear Mighty God.  Do it now for your glory.  Let us receive and soak in your love as never before.  May we know it in the depths of our hearts today and everyday more and more.  Let us remember Jesus and the scars, evidence of your love for us.  May we live out of that love and your grace.  Let us know you are the perfect parent we have been searching for, in those who just do not or have not given to us, but you do Father.  In the Precious Name of Jesus Amen...

We are not an orphan but a child of the King...Not a slave but a son, daughter.  Happy Valentines Day

Tuesday, February 11, 2014

Dream the Impossible Dream

Dream the Impossible Dream....

Dream the Impossible Dream

It is a bit of folk wisdom to say no two snow flakes are alike. Wilson A. Bentley photographed snowflakes on a black velvet cloth in the late 19th Century. He photographed approximately 5,000 snowflakes over a 40 year period and no two were alike.

If it is true that no two snowflakes are alike, how much more individual are each of us. Have you ever wondered why I like broccoli and you may not. Why I like traditional, country music, classical also, plays, birds, photography, reading and yet your interest may not be the same at all? Can you fathom a God that has created us each as individuals, individually with our own personal interest, likes and dislikes, longings, desires, personalities not to mention our appearances and social status or lack there of.  Can you fathom how vast our God is?  He created us each so different but yet in His image.  WOW!

Many of us have dreams. Many of us have given those dreams away or you might say, up. We have lost hope in our dreams... that they may never happen. I see dreams as a hope, even a faith if you will. Abraham hoped for a son and he was made the father of the faithful. I want to suggest to you that when our dreams, hopes are enveloped in the promises of God, they are not to be given up on.

Faith looks on the unseen. There is another world, the Spiritual world, and things are going on we can only imagine. But everyday someones dreams are fulfilled. Many in the bible did not see their dreams fulfilled but they came to pass, after their death.

I was talking to a friend about such dreams. She said she had no theological reference but she believed that even in heaven we would be working to fulfill these dreams. You may have a dream of no more conflict or anger, happy family, a ministry, writing a book, a well body or whatever your dream is. These things may happen after your life time or they maybe continued in heaven. Joni Ereckson who is in a wheelchair dreams of dancing in heaven. I want to be a singer and an artist. I love to dance and dance today with my broom, like it is Jesus. One day it will be...

We all long for no more sin, no more tears, no more pain. This is a dream of a perfect life that will be in heaven. I want to appeal to you to not give up your dream. But to work for it with all joy and might and enjoy God in the process. The process is as important as the fulfillment of the dream. I believe each of us, when we allow our hearts to thrive, have a God given dream we are to play a role in this life in fulfilling or hoping for.

Paul had a mission, a dream. It was to spread the gospel. Wherever he was his dream was in focus, whether in prison or free. Pray about it, your dream or getting one if you don't have one or one maybe you have let go of. A childhood dream. See what God wants you to do, who He wants to bring into your life and see just what our God, who creates even the snowflakes to be special, will and can do. So are you special and so is your purpose here on this earth. Think big or think small but think God. He is able to fulfill your dream or dreams if you have many, here on this earth, maybe after you or even into the Heavens...I believe the abundant life God promises us is filled with hope and love and dreams and faith.  It takes faith and trust to have a dream and trust God to do what we cannot.

Monday, February 10, 2014

I Will Give You Rest

This is a photograph I took yesterday while taking a ride with my friend Susan on a gorgeous day.

Sunday, February 9, 2014

How Do I Choose To Live Today?

His pleasure is not in the strength of the horse,
    nor his delight in the legs of the warrior;
11 the Lord delights in those who fear him,
    who put their hope in his unfailing love.

How do I choose to live this day?  You cannot be angry or upset, if you like that word better, at someone and not have a hard heart toward the Lord.  You cannot compartmentalize your heart.  You cannot open one part of your heart and shut the other part off.  How do I choose to live this day.

I have had a medicine change.  I was drugged, tired and discouraged.  How my medicine was affecting me was affecting my hope, my heart.  What was I trusting in?  Who was I trusting in.

Another time another place this day of discouragement, of struggling in relationships and my circumstances would have put me to bed for 3 days.  But this day I decided I would trust in the Lord.  I would fear God Almighty.  To fear God is not to be scared of Him but to be in awe of who He is and what He has done.

I decided not to give in, give up but to persevere.  To press on in my relationships and living life.  I went to dinner with my husband and to my sons roping and had a great time.  I chose life.

I have noticed I am impatient.  I don't like to wait in long lines.  I like my food fast and quick.  I cannot compartmentalize my heart.  I must also be impatient with God.  Wanting Him to work quickly in me, my heart and the hearts of others.  Am I willing to persevere through, to press on, to live life or do I want to give up as I did once before?  Am I willing to wait but not a passive wait but an active wait.  A living of life.

We tend to be an all or nothing people.  We give it our all but if things don't work out according to our plans we give up or stop loving or doing for that person or at that task at hand.  But to press on when you don't get the results you expect or want when you want it or think it should happen or maybe the task is harder than you expect it would be, to continue to complete is perseverance.

Yesterday across the back pasture of the farm I saw six deer running across the pasture.  I wish I had a picture for you.  They had heads forward, leaping and running across the path with no fear.  They knew where they were going and nothing was stopping them.  It was a picture to me of how I could and would be in Christ with Him as my focus.  I am to never give up.  I persevere with His perseverance. 

Hebrews 12:1-2  Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

My feet were, are to be as hinds feet.  To set on high places.  To set my feet upon a rock and press on.  I was not to give up, give in but to press into my Lord and Savior who is in charge of my day.  Who is teaching me at every point to be more like Jesus.  Suffering produces perseverance  I know this is one thing He was teaching me through this medicine change.  How to keep on keeping on but not a drudgery but with joy and peace and enjoying Him and others. 

 Love is patient 1 Corinthians 13.  To love God and love others I must be patient and not shut off my heart to others and to God.  To be open and vulnerable to Gods plan for my life is a hard thing when you are weak.  But to be honest in the face of weakness and to lean on Him for my strength, to just take the next step in faith, is a place of courage.  It is a confident meekness.  A confident humility in Him and that He is my hope.  Do I know Gods unfailing love.  Do I trust it?  Do I trust Him?