Wednesday, July 31, 2013

My Baby Girl

This is me and my baby girl many years ago.  Please pray for her tonight and tomorrow.  Thank you so much friends.  I love her so but Jesus loves her more.  I am not asking God for easy but for His wondrous glory and for my precious daughters very good.

Go Fishing

I wanted to give you this verse the Lord gave me this morning.

Matthew 6:30-34

New American Standard Bible (NASB)
30 But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the furnace, will He not much moreclothe you? You of little faith! 31 Do not worry then, saying, ‘What will we eat?’ or ‘What will we drink?’ or ‘What will we wear for clothing?’ 32 For the Gentiles eagerly seek all these things; foryour heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. 33 But[a]seek first [b]His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be [c]added to you.
34 “So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will [d]care for itself. [e]Each day has enough trouble of its own.

The Spirit is teaching me to live in today.  Just like the Israelites got Manna every day to live on.  They could not store it or maggots would get it.  This represents Jesus and His grace.  We need it everyday.  The time we spent with Him yesterday will not carry over to today.  It has to be fresh and new.  A friend of mine said that grace is like fish.  It has to be caught fresh everyday.  His mercies are new every morning.  Go catch your fresh fish for the day.

Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Idols of the Heart

When I mention idols what do you think of?  At first I think of the gold calf the Israelites worshiped in the desert.  In the circle of Christian counseling we are told we have nest of idols, man.  What is an idol?  It is anything we worship besides Christ.  It is something or someone we look to give us what only the gospel can give us.  For instance significance, value, worth, love to make us feel like we are somebody.  We can need someone to love us in order to fill our heart up.

My husband use to be an idol for me.  If he was ok, I was ok.  If he thought I was ok, it made me feel good and valued.  He was my god.  He was at the center of my world, my life.  He made me who I was.  I thought more of pleasing him than what I thought God wanted me to do.

My children have also been an idol for me.  If they were successful and happy so was I.

Tim Keller says you don't know an alcoholic unless you take away their alcohol.  I have never thought of myself as a materialistic person.  I don't get a thrill out of new things or shopping.  When we moved back to our farm we had to store some things in a barn.  I sat and saw those things be destroyed by pest, weather, dirt.  Some of the children's things that they had when they were young.  It broke my heart.  I thought I didn't know "things" meant so much to me.  Then the Lord showed me yes they have a place in your heart because they are sentimental but they are just things.  You cannot take them with you.  What I value is you and my relationship with you.  I had to just let it go.  Nothing could be done and I could let it rob me of my joy and be miserable or decide it was indeed just things.

I am very sensitive to my heart.  When I have a wrong motive, sinful attitudes, sin of omission the Spirit convicts me.  I am aware of who and what I am worshiping.  When I get the first indication or conviction of my heart having something too important to me I go to the Lord and ask Him to change my heart and He does.  John Bettler said when a desire becomes a demand it is an idol.  We are never sin free.  We have wrong motives about everything we do.  We will not be sin free until we go to heaven.  The only way we can ever go to our Father God is because of the blood of Jesus.  I probably think too much about sin and need to think more about Jesus and His love for me.  Our sins are forgiven as far as the east is from the west.  There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.  Christ death and resurrection paid in full to God for our sins.  He made peace with God for us.  God is no longer angry over our sin.  Jesus said it is finished.  We are to live in that freedom and grace everyday.  God wants us to have a clean conscience so we can hear the Spirit and be led by Jesus in how to live and love others.  You cannot have an open and honest relationship if you are feeling guilty all the time.  If you are feeling guilty we can repent of our sins and experience the love and forgiveness of Christ that is always ours.  When Christ love touches your heart you just know that you know that you know.  He touched me oh He touched me and made me whole.

Monday, July 29, 2013

While Waiting

In the Waiting

"Bear each others' burdens and so fulfill the Law of Christ."
(Galatians 6:2)

If there were a good way out of it, I probably wouldn't write this devotional. Since there isn't, I want to know what is it that God will give me to say to you and to me. The reason I write, always, is to tell of God's faithfulness. I usually try to give a personal illustration, a need or question, and then how God has proven Himself faithful. Follow with me now and let's see if together we can do this.

My personal illustration: I am hurting, confused and desperate. My child is in a horrible situation and in much pain. My world seems upside down. I am stopping, by God's mercy, a smoking habit that I have had for 45 years--trying to figure out how to live my life although I am 63 years old. I thought I had some spiritual maturity, but right now I seem like such a little child in my faith. It doesn't even seem to matter. I have no Christian answers.

My need: Apart from Christ I see no way out of any of this. I am desperate. I need a Savior. My life and my heart is a big mess. Is my maturity based on my faith, or the need I see I have? I have seen my depravity many times before, but I always had a redemptive story, the gospel at the end. I am trying to be positive here, but for the life of me I can't see that redemptive story this time. I could just write some things that would be the gospel, but I don't think that is what God wants me to do.

There is a very well-known pastor who tweeted today that he had lost 20 pounds. He usually gives the gospel. But today he said, "I really lost 20 pounds." I thought, Are you kidding me? Are you boasting in the gospel or what? Who really cares.? I am cynical, I guess.

Life is incredible. God is so big. I feel so very small and insignificant. Like a grain of sand on the seashore. But if that is so, how can my life feel like such a huge mess? It is so out of my hands. All I can do trust God. But right now, I am not trusting. I feel sad, lost, and stunned--like a deer in headlights.

Someone told me that God is building character in me. I don't know what that means, but I hope it is so. One thing I have learned, there is not always a happy ending to the story. God is going to have to write it, and then see to it that it happens.

Would you pray for me and my family? Would you have faith for us? I am so weak. I have no self sufficiency left. I think I have hit bottom. I am broken--surrendered for about the 20th time. I feel like Little Red Riding Hood who has lost her way and is confronted by the big, bad wolf. Except I am not even scared.

I am just waiting to see what God is going to do with this mess. The funny thing is I know He still loves me. I just can't fix this, this time. My trying to fix never works anyway.
~ deborah ford

Saturday, July 27, 2013

Paul Tripp Article

It kills me when I have these questions and the Spirit speaks to me so clearly and so sure.  This was meant for me.  What about you?  I know for me

Idols of the Heart

When I was a young girl I use to like to play with magnets.  I had one long one and then some short ones.  It was fun to watch them repel and attract to each other.  This is how I think of the idols of our heart.  We can repent of one and another will be drawn to the magnet.

You might ask what is an idol.  It is a false gospel.  It is something our heart is drawn to find significance in.  It promises to give us things the gospel is meant to give us.  Worth, value, pleasure, contentment, peace, happiness, joy.  The list could go on and on.  The thing about these idols they don't truly satisfy.  They make us feel good for a moment but then the craving is for more and more.  Never being enough and really ministering to the needs and desires of our heart.

We are really helpless to rid ourselves of idols.  We can pray for God to give us the gift of repentance but all we can do is seek His face and see our desperate need of Him to set us free.

I repented of some idols this past Sun I wrote about.  I was so excited and thankful.  I did good for a few days and then day before yesterday I noticed some of my old ways of dealing with life were surfacing.  I tried harder to become more active, spend time with wonderful friends, ask for prayer.  Actually I think that is why I have the grace to see this other idol in my life.  I think it was already there.  I had wondered about it from time to time but just ignored its pull to my heart for significance and pleasure.

Would you please pray for me.  I am really discouraged.  I thought I was being set free from some life time struggles and I see this in its place.  I was suppose to go off with my family and I couldn't pull myself away to go.  I am spending today seeking Gods heart and what on earth I am going to do.  I really am desperate for my Savior.

Friday, July 26, 2013

Get Down and Messy

I can remember the day and almost the pig tails with ribbons and pretty dress she wore.  My daughter was almost two.  She was like my play doll.  I dressed her precious and kept her that way all the time.  One day my husband was working in the back yard.  He made the comment, "she doesn't even know what it is to get dirty".  I picked up her  darling little self and took her to him in the back yard.  He sat her down right in the middle of the dirt.  Yes I held my breath but I knew he was right.  She had to experience the dirt to experience being all clean.

I so wanted to protect my children.  I use to tell my friends, I just want to put them in a climate control glass bubble in the middle of a beautiful place and keep them protected from ever getting hurt.  Well I knew that wasn't realistic but I sure tried to pull it off with my children for as long as I could I tried to protect them from pain.  It did not work.

This is not this life.  We are promised pain and suffering by God.  If you love people you are going to get messy and get hurt and hurt those you love.  It is just inevitable.  It is going to happen.  The Spirit uses our suffering and pain as a major way for us to know God and love Him and others. To bring Him glory.  For us to know His mercy.   It is the part of the christian story that is not told.  If you are a christian you are going to suffer. And if you love you are going to help others and it will be costly to you.  It is the only way the captives can be set free.   Breaking the walls of protection they have one brick at a time.  As they shut out the pain they shut out life.  They build walls to shrink their world to something they can control.

If you are a friend and have friends and are going to be with them through their suffering you are going to have to be willing to get down and get dirty.  Things will go up and down.  You will suffer as your friend suffers and you will want to fix them and their lives to relieve you both from feeling the pain.  It is an illusion and it won't work.  The situation has to be experienced.  Their problems will affect you but you cannot be their god.  You have to learn to do what you can and advise and point to Christ and the gospel but leave the results to God. Don't look for all the information you need to come from them.  They may not can even face their life but be in denial.  As you give them the courage they need to face what they cannot face alone the fears will be brought captive.  THe blinders will have to come off.  God probably won't work in the way you expect.  He loves surprises and bringing beauty out of ashes.  You may find your assets are your weakness.  You are going to do things wrong but God will use them in ways you can't expect.  You will have to believe when they lose hope and hold them up in prayer when they can't pray for themselves.  You may fight discouragement and anger at them if they don't follow your instruction or can't for a time.  The thoughts of their freedom maybe too grand for them at one point.  It maybe easier for them to stay imprisoned.  It is what is familiar.  THey don't know how to live free.  God may break you as much as He breaks them.  You may grow more or as much as they do.  You are partnering with the Spirit in the redemption of a child of God.  It is risky and not safe.  If they are fragile and scared they may have periods of depending too much on you as they learn to depend on God.  They will need you to guide the way.

Loving people is worth the pain, the risk and the getting dirty when you have to.  Don't try to figure things out, that is the flesh, trust God and His truth to provide what you need.  Fight from putting them under the law.  It appears like it will fix situations but it can't change a heart. THere is no power in the law. The rewards you will experience through setting the captives free and your partnership with the Spirit can not be explained but taught and caught.  You will be aware you have been in a huge Spiritual battle that Christ fought on the cross and now you are fighting with Him.  Remember it is not against flesh and blood but Spiritual.  We are in a war.  You are actually giving them Jesus.  God has just given you the honor He gave Moses.  Don't take it lightly.  God trust you to bring Him glory in what may have thought of as an impossible situation and without God it would be.

Thursday, July 25, 2013

What I Deserve

Lately I have been praying about my heart.  Sometimes when my husband responds to me in kindness I can feel my attitude soften.  Well the way I understand it is when my husband responds to me in kindness my excuses and justification for a undeserving harsh attitude I have against him is made clear to me. It is like I repent right then and my heart is changed to a love and acceptance.  As long as my husband responds to me in a harsh way I feel justified in responding back to him in a harsh way.  His sin blinds me from seeing my own sin.  Only grace takes that away.  The anger does not bring about the righteousness of God.

Yesterday I wrote about my addiction and what God was doing in my heart.  I began to be puzzled about why I could read these articles from my counselor before and they hadn't convicted me but Sunday when I had read them I was completely broken over my sin of comfort.

One thing I failed to recognize when I confessed my smoking to my counselor and the people on the forum was how loving they were to me.  My counselor did not shame me or reject me like I expected.   No he doesn't treat me that way.  That is not how he treats me but it is how my hearts treats myself.  One of the ladies on the forum wrote me back with understanding and kindness.  They did not treat me with disappointment but with the truth of what was going on in my heart in the most loving and accepting way.  I was no less a person to them now that they knew I smoked.  I could cry now thinking about it and all the years of shame and guilt it has been used by Satan to condemn me.  My counselor seemed more concerned about me thinking I could obtain some kind of perfection and was wanting me to find rest that only comes from accepting the perfection of Christ for my own.

How do you see Jesus?  Do you feel an under current of disapproval if you did not measure up in what you should have accomplished today.  Is your house clean but you just got to get in that one dirty closet.  Are the kids good but they can make better grades.  If you just work longer and harder...If you could just lose that extra 5 pds, look better, exercise more and hold those shoulders up like your mother always said.

Even at the most horrific time, at the cross, Jesus said Father, forgive them for they know not what they do.  Christ also said it is finished.  That means that the price He paid for your sin was enough.  The Father is completely satisfied.  When He looks at you He knows you struggle in certain areas of sin but He loves and totally accepts you as beautiful and righteous, loved child of His.  Nothing can change the way He feels about you.  You could sin a hundred times this morning before breakfast and He would still adore you.  As a matter of fact we never have a completely sinless act and motive.  All we can do is trust God in all we do.  Apart from Him we can do nothing.  Anything apart from faith is sin.  The work we are to do is to believe in the One who He sent for me.

So what happens when we have this totally unconditional love lavished upon us by God, it brings us to repentance.  Our excuses to sin is overcome by this love that won't let us go.  It makes us long to love others with this love that is poured out in our hearts so undeservingly.  It removes the blinders to our sin, justifying, blaming, excusing. We hate sin.  It crucified our Lord.  We confess it quickly and linger not in condemnation but forgiveness.   We see clearly deeper and deeper into the wells of our hearts as light of love is shinned upon us.  But no longer is our sin the center of our relationship with God. He took that guilt and shame on the cross.   It is a love exchange.  It is to delight and grow in this love that never lets us go.  You enter that Promised Land with Him more and more until your heart knows when that peace is not there between you and God because of you trying to be perfect again instead of realizing the only perfection this side of heaven is in Christ life.  Can you be enveloped in it and the absolute radical love He has for you?  He just does not give us what we deserve but forgiveness, mercy and grace.  His love beyond measure.

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Prince of Peace

My son trains horses.  He just bought and put up a horse walker.  I didn't know what that was so I will tell you in case you don't either.  It looks like the underside of an umbrella and the horse are put to the rods and it turns around and around.  Of course they never get anywhere and they are not intended to.  It is to exercise the horses.

I have been struggling with the addiction of smoking for over 40 years.  I have done everything there is to try to quit like holding a rotten lung to chantix and acupuncture.  My point is I have gone round and round like the Israelites in the desert trying to find some magical scheme to help me quit smoking.  I have quit several times only to start back.  I hate smoking but wow did I enjoy it.  I loved relaxing and visiting with friends while puffing up a storm.  I knew it wasn't good for me but that didn't help me quit.

Sunday morning I wrote a group of friends on a forum and told them my dilemma.  I was desperate.  My counselor  suggested I get support from this community and read some of his articles.  I hopelessly did.  As I read the articles they began to talk of the condition of my heart.  This was not new news to me but had not affected me.  I began to see my heart in a small knot filled full of idols like self reliance, unbelief, self righteousness.  All kind of things I trusted in like my marriage, children, perfectionism, safety, control.  The list went on and on.  I was writing and I wrote I cannot get rid of all these sins.  I began to cry. I was smoking, crying and writing.  I know people on the forum were praying for me. I was so embarrassed.  I felt they could all see me as I really was and I was ashamed.  This was my preconceived ideas.  They loved me unconditionally.   I could not help myself.  I was so fearful and hurting.   The Lord said to me, "I love you".  He loved me just as the big mess that I am.  I couldn't get myself right.  He wanted me to let Him into the center of my heart where all these idols were.  I still was crying and said I can't let you into the center of who I am, without any walls, you will hurt me again.  I said but please don't leave me.  Don't let me go.  I cannot let you in but I need you to not leave me.

The next thing I knew I could sense Christ at the center of my heart.  Where all this stuff was.  It was like His Spirit became one with me.  I looked over at the 3 packs of cigarettes and thought I can't throw them away.  Church was about to start.  I threw some clothes on.  I knew I had to go worship even though I felt so weak.  I went to church and worshiped for 2 hrs.  When I came home all I wanted to do was curl up in the arms of My Father and Savior by the Spirit.  This has gone on for four days now.  The cigarettes are still on my porch.  I have no desire for them.  It is like I am free from the addiction.  I feel an inner power but no strength of my own.

I am gaining strength yesterday afternoon and today.  I have just laid around and done very little.  I don't know when I have cried as much as I did on Sunday morning.  I just prayed wash me Lord.  Wash me clean.  I feel like my will is broken.  Like His will is my will.  I feel an inner peace.  I went to my grandsons last night for dinner with him.  We laughed and laughed.  It was like I was free from the bondage that had oppressed me for 40 years, the addiction, the things, shame, guilt that kept me captive.  I had tried to free myself for years and had made some outward progress but I just moved the walls tighter around me, my heart.  I said Lord will my tears melt these walls down.  Will your love.  I could feel the walls were gone and the Spirit of the Father and Son filled my soul, my being.

I am not sure what I have been going through but I think I have been moving from my own strength being melted away to moving to leaning on the strength of Christ.  I had tried to experience something similar last week but I was not in the place I needed to be of complete desperation.  I share this story for hope and encouragement that we never get too far from God.  He is totally committed to us.  He fought some kinda of battle to rescue me from myself and my will.  I feel the peace like the rivers flow into the oceans.  It is the peace that passes all understanding of man or woman.  It is Him, the Prince of Peace indwelling us.

Monday, July 22, 2013

Some sweet day...

Romans 8:21-23
New King James Version (NKJV)
21 because the creation itself also will be delivered from the bondage of corruption into the glorious liberty of the children of God. 22 For we know that the whole creation groans and labors with birth pangs together until now. 23 Not only that, but we also who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, eagerly waiting for the adoption, the redemption of our body.

Kate had a healthy baby boy. The article said how proud they are.

I sat one evening with a group of young moms. The topic of childbirth came up. I made the statement that I had all my children by natural childbirth but one and I didn't love the others any more that the one I had something before I delivered.

The whole earth is in labor, breathe in 1 2 3 and out. In and out. Sometimes I ache and dream of redemption of our body, myself, my family and so many I love. We groan within ourselves eagerly waiting for the adoption. Our fullness realized. It is already but not yet. I long for deliverance from the bondage of corruption into the glorious liberty of being a child of God. We are promised, guaranteed. There is the pain and then the relief. We are promised it so.

When the next suffering come or even the one that is here now, remember the promised of God to His children. There is a greater day coming but until then He is with us through it all. He feels every pain. None of it is wasted. Whether you have had a child, or father, or whatever your situation you know the pains of labor that creations suffers. Keep your eyes fixed on Jesus. Remember the cross and the promise. Some sweet day...

Friday, July 19, 2013


I just got an email from my friend who helped organize my class reunion.  He said all the books were taken but 3 and there were 3 that didn't come.  That was my goal for right now that all my classmates that wanted it got a copy and read it.  He said they had great reviews.  It sounded like they didn't even pay any attention to the duplicate page.  I am so thankful and elated.  The rest is down hill.  I am just following Him one step at a time.

A Miracle

Thank you all for praying for me about the error in the printing of the book.  I am at complete rest.  What ever God works out will be good with me.  It is not my book but His.  He gave me the joy of Him writing it and I hope others will also.  But I trust Him completely.

Thursday, July 18, 2013


I met with Martha,and my cousin today about the book. There is a big error in printing the book. I cannot sell it this way. I don't know what I am going to do with the books because of this huge error. PLease pray some thoughts come to me that I can use it as it is in some way. It was not cheap to have them self published and don't feel I can invest in any more prints at this time because of that. I am probably going to have it on e book. I just thought isn't it a thing that a lady with a messed up life would print a messed up book. Like I said God uses crooked sticks. Hope and pray he uses this. I sure do appreciate your prayers and suggestions.

Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Can Being Right Be Wrong?

There is someone I love who I was around for awhile recently.  It seemed every time I said something to him, he said I know.  It was so much so it was very noticeable to others.  I began to think about people that not only think they are right all the time but they pretty much are right.  We use to call people like that a know it all, when I was young.  Finishing with  she is never wrong.  

Can being right be wrong?  I began to look at my own life.  I don't do a lot of talking.  I mostly listen and write my thoughts.  When that is the case you have time to make sure what you are writing is right as much as you can tell.  Then I thought who likes to be around a know it all.  Besides aren't we suppose to be about relationships, with each other and God Himself?   Pretty much in a conversation when the right answer is given it will cause the relationship to end.  There is nothing more to say.  It is a quick way to shut everyone up.

I thought of the pride and arrogance of thinking you are smart enough to give other people what you think is right.  Who determines right from wrong anyway?  There are many times I have thought things were wrong and God used it in more of a good way than if what I wanted happened.  Sometimes I think we think right is the decision that causes the less pain.  Maybe even the easiest.  How often do I pray and ask the Spirit what I should do?  Get wisdom from wise friends?  Not enough.  I try to come up with solutions on my own.  I use to think anything that keeps the peace is what is the right thing to do.  Well sometimes an argument is just what the conversation needs.  Relationships are usually stronger after both parties repent to God and each other.

Is a person that always knows the right thing to do in their eyes and others a black and white person?  Is it a person who is legalistic.  They have a low view of the laws of God because they have lower them to something they can keep.  God came to fulfill the law and increase the law when He said to love Him with all your heart and your neighbor as yourself.  Is that the right answer to every question.  It is neither circumcision nor uncircumcision that counts but faith working through love.  We are no longer under the law but it is written on our heart.  The law of love by faith.  The only way we can love is for Jesus to love through us.  It is His love that we love with and trust God with the outcome.  We are powerless apart from God.  It seems the older I get the less I know.  God has stripped me of all the things I depend on to work but Him.  There I go trying to figure things out again.  Life is personal and relational so there is no pat answer to anything but "Jesus".

Monday, July 15, 2013

What Do I Do

Where do I run? What do I do? All my projects are taken care of that I had lined up. The grands are gone. All that is left is a memory. A joyful memory.

I want to be in God will. I think what is happening is His will. He wills it to be so.  He is above revealing His will to me.  He is not about keeping it a secret.  I am to plan well, seek others advice, look to His word and pray.  Then I can go forth knowing He uses it all for good even when I may not make the easiest choice it does not mean it was not the best for me.

I have slept a lot since the kids gone. I am thinking about taking some courses for counseling. Mostly counseling myself. My mind has to stay going and so does my body or I feel I will fade away. I got my book finished. So details to take care of there.

The kids left me with such joy. Life is so wonderful as a child. I had a good friends wife pass today into the arms of Jesus. I am sad and happy about that. She will be so missed here but in such a better place. Please pray for her husband that God will comfort Him as He is. They truly were a picture of Christ and His church.

I am off for now. I have missed you all so much. I just have not had the time or the word.

Keep the faith, press on and keep your eyes on Jesus. He loves you so and brings blessing after blessing your way. Do you have a dream? Don't let it die. Keep pressing onward to what God might do in it and through you. I don't know what God has for me or you but I don't want to stop trying on my end. I am not responsible for the results but am responsible for the doing. Then God takes over. I want to encourage you as I encourage me take that step of faith and press on.

Sunday, July 14, 2013

Lets Celebrate

Matt:18:3   “Assuredly, I say to you, unless you are converted and become as little children, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven."

Our grandchildren just came and stayed a few weeks with us.  All I could do prior to that time was plan things we could do and things I could teach them.  After they left I was reviewing the things we did while they were here, our memories.  I was trying to remember the teaching moments we had.  I must admit there weren't many times of me teaching them but lots of times of them teaching me.  You might ask, "what did they teach you while they were here?"  They taught me to be a little child again.  They did this last year while they were here for a visit.  I need lots of reminding.  Lots of humbling.

As the time has passed from one year to the next life has slowly sucked the joy right out of me.  So slow I didn't even realize it had happened.  I had picked up my burdens.

 I remember when my husband was a head football coach and we would fly to away games.  He would be so tense, studying on the way there.  Then if we lost he would be upset on the way back home.  But then I began to notice that win or lose he would be all worried about the next game.  We were not  even celebrating the win.   There was no difference on our flight back home whether we won or lost.  I remember thinking something is bad wrong here.  We are not even happy when we win.  This is a little how my life has gone lately. I have forgotten how to laugh.  I have let the worries and suffering so consume my life I have stopped celebrating the good life which Jesus has given me.  It is like I am holding my breath and waiting for the other shoe to drop.  My suffering has grabbed my attention, along with my pride.  So much so that it is all I am focusing on.  Not the abundant life, the free life, the joyful life that Jesus gave His life for me to live.  

There is nothing that can happened to me or my loved ones that can rob me of a happy, content, loving intimate relationship with my God. It is only pride thinking I know best and trying to be god to everyone around me.  Yes of course we feel the pain and suffering of life but our rest, joy and happiness is not because of our circumstances of life but in the life Himself.  Our peace and love is contained in the person of Christ living His life through us.

My grandchildren were so dependent on us.  The would say can I do this mem, pop?  They laughed out loud and they danced and they would sing.  They didn't care who was watching them, they were just enjoying the moment.  They played in mud puddles, dove in the waves at the ocean, they were silly and funny, they jumped and skipped. We let them sleep in the room with us, making pallets on the floor.  We didn't have to worry if they got enough sleep.  They fell asleep as soon as their precious eyes were close. They were enjoying life and what God had given them.  They were not worried about tomorrow or felt burdened by yesterday.  They wanted to live and let live.  They ate ice-cream and cookies and were so active they didn't have to be concerned with their weight.  They rode horses and jumped on the trampoline.  They weren't concerned about what others said about them, they were contagious.  It was catching.  Life was fun and funny.  It kept slipping through our hands to others so we had to keep filling our hands full.

Since then I have reflected on our times together and ask the Lord to help me know what it is to have a child like faith and joy again.  To know that everything that happens is sifted through fingers of love.  I can relax, live and love people again.  I won't break if I crack a smile or give a hug or even catch fireflies in the dark.  I can risk it all and be happy in the life of the one who is life.  I can quit trying to control my life and my families to be happy.  I can just let it happen.  We had serious times, like when we prayed but even then we had a smile on our face and love in our hearts.

I miss their joy and their laughter.  I can only imagine how the Father has missed me.  I want to enjoy and delight in Him with no fears of what tomorrow may bring.  If God is indeed in control and has a perfect plan for me and my loved ones, why should I worry.  The game is over and we won!  Lets celebrate.

Thursday, July 4, 2013

Freedom, 4th of July

I am taking a  break writing while my grands are here.  Take this time to look at some previously posted devotionals.  www.whispersofgod.or and this blog.  Hope you have a wonderful 4th as it reminds you of the freedom we have in Christ.