The Silent Sickness

Why does it take courage to admit and share you have mental illness?

For a long time, I felt shame when I though of sharing with others about mental illness. I didn't understand it myself. I hated to go into groups, such as church. I didn't know who knew and who didn't know I was sick. I always felt inferior, like surely people were talking about me. One way to stop gossip is to be honest about the truth. I came out of the closet. My husband and I went public about my illness. We gave interviews.  My husband sponsored charity golf tournaments. I began to read about famous people, of years ago and present, that had the disease. They were not ashamed to speak out to help others. I felt called to do the same. This is one reason I write.

I think we naturally judge others. Not too long ago I had severe anxiety. The advice that I received from most people was that I was not trusting God. I repented of lack of faith and went to the Lord over and over to increase my faith. As it turned out I was having an allergic reaction to one of my meds.

Once I spoke in a church. Afterward a lady came up to me and said, " I am going to pray for you". I thanked her. She said Satan has a hold of you. Some of the church has assumed that mental illness is caused by sin. The mentally ill have no more sin than anyone else.  We will all struggle with sin until we see Him face to face.

There is a close minded thinking on taking medications for those who suffer.  I do think in some cases it is given too freely, but in others, it is needed and not received.  Many patients, including me, have this thinking in the back of our mind that it is a weakness to take medicine.  So we get a little bit better and then off of it we go.  Only to get sick again and relapse.  It becomes even harder to bring us back to reality.  At this point we are tempted to self medicate with things such as alcohol, drugs and pain killers.  I know I have done it.  The medicine is not a cure all, but it does give you a chance to go into remission where you can deal with life and any issues that might be troubling you.  You can educated yourself.  You can think clearly again in a lot of cases.  It takes a constant tweaking and changing medications, with side effects and symptoms all along the way, searching for the right medication with an excellent, gifted doctor.  Some never find the right medication to help.  But it is a God given resource that helps many.  I am one of those.  Mental illness is a biological brain disorder, that for  most of us, it responses positively to medication.

People are largely uneducated on mental illness. I have lost friends because I have shared honestly with them. Some are afraid of it and the people who have it. We are just ordinary people with a brain that is lacking in what it needs to be healthy, so we generally are on medication, vitamins, along with counseling, exercise, good nutrition, support of friends and family, lots of rest, and the support of a good doctor and the church. For some this is not enough.

I am fortunate to have the best of care. Many are not so fortunate. The government has cut back on funds and hospitals for the mentally ill tremendously. The jails and prisons are now flooded with these individuals and they don't know what to do with them in most cases. Please contact your congressmen, know who they are and help educate them on mental illness. There is help with getting medications through the manufacture of some of the medications.

Most groups are reaching out to be educated on how to deal with the mentally ill.  I have spoken to police departments, people in the medical field, churches, manufactures employees. A friend and I led a support group for the mi. There are programs with an organization called NAMI. National Alliance of the Mentally Ill. THis is where most of my training and education on the subject came from, also my doctor.   NAMI also has programs for the families of the mentally ill.  They educate all who desire to be educated.  Their website is www.nami.org.

It has been said that Mary Magdalene had mental illness before Jesus healed her.  She was the first one for Him to appear to after the resurrection.  He has compassion for the mentally ill.  He died for the sinner and for the sick.  He may not heal our bodies and minds in this life but He heals our hearts.

Please message me on Desperate Delight on face book if I can help in any way. There is much to learn and know if you are affected with mental illness either yourself or someone you know and love.