CELEBRATING MOTHERHOOD
God loves using imperfect women to care for His imperfect world.
I have been thinking about womanhood and how God has used women in my life and the lives of my children.
I had such joy in being a mother to my four children. It was what I wanted most in life was to be a good mom. No one could love their children more than me. It is one of the greatest gifts the Father has given me, my four children. It was a desire of my heart that I have been blessed with in such a wonderful way.
Grace upon grace showers my mothering. I was a young mother, my first child was stillborn when I was 21. My heart goes out to all mothers who have lost their children. Our second child was born one year later. I knew so little about being a good mom then.
I think we all have felt we have failed as a mother at some point in our lives. It is Gods grace that allows us to see that we can't mess up so much in our roles as mother that God cannot make something beautiful out of our mistakes. We are not perfect as mothers but it does not mean we do not love our children dearly.
I now see that our children are only given to us by God for a short while and then they are on their own. They are His children first. I did not understand fully how God wanted to help me parent my children. He wants to partner with us as a parent, trust Him in our parenting, and teach them Gods ways. The pressure of parenting is lessened when we trust God with our children. It is easier to love our children just as they are and who God has created them to be. It brings joy to the precious opportunity and blessing God has given us as mothers to not only parent our own children but also help others parent in the family of God.
We as a body of Christ are in one family. It is our joy to help each other raise each others children for the glory of God and His kingdom. What a beautiful picture we have as we unite together in this practical picture that God has given us of His family. Womanhood is Gods way of caring for His family whether you have children or not. We are adopted into this family of God that God loves with all His heart. He is our Abba. Being a woman is beautiful. There is no higher calling than to help mother and nurture and care for Gods future kingdom.
So happy Mothers Day to every woman out there. To single moms. I applaud you. You are brave. I want to encourage you ladies who long for children of your own. There are woman who would love, love, love for you to come along side them in parenting. Be encouraged. Take a little love and come alone side these women and their children. Even teenagers need a woman when they may struggle the most. You have much wisdom to offer as a single woman or even an older mother. Move into a woman's need for help in raising her children with your gifts as a woman. You will bless her more than you can imagine. To those of you who chose adoption. How precious is this that you would give a child a loving home. Just like our "Father"in heaven, who has adopted us. To those mothers who foster children. Your hearts are gold. It is a precious calling.
My children were far apart in age so it was like I had two families. I was so blessed by those who came into my children's lives when my girls got older. Like my husbands sister. My sister. My daughters friend from church taught her so much. A student that was there and has been there also later in my daughters and my life. My daughters spiritual moms have meant a lot to her and these women have been such a blessing to me. Our good friends in Arkansas were good friends to me and help with son when I began to be sick. I also had two sitters at one time to make sure my girls who were older and my son. It was my goal to leave my children as little as possible. At times the sitters would go with me with the children. We did so much together as a family when they were young.
I want to remember the women who were good friends to me. We raised our children together. Most of these woman are still in my life today. I remember a group of us praying for our children, their lives, their mates, Gods plans for them and their love for God from the time they were born. They encouraged me to take time for me. At that time it just added to the long list of things that needed to be done. I actually thought it was selfish. But I have come to see that you can't care for those you love if you do not care for your own needs first. The body and the mind can only bare so much.
The time with your children can seem like a lifetime but it passes so fast. I have wonderful memories of my children. Their uniqueness, their laughter and the memories of their childhood brings me such joy just remembering. I loved nursing my children. But found out it is not for every child. I nursed all my children watching them sleep in my arms. I wanted to give my children a good start. I do think the bonding of feeding your own children is important as much as you can however you can.
This paragraph was a gift to me from God in remembering my own children's childhood.
You are welcome to skip over my memories
I wanted my children to see me praying to God and studying Gods word. They were in church almost 3 times a week. We loved our churches. As a coaches wife I was both mother and father during that time. The job of college coaching was so demanding during those years. There was no limit on the time they worked or recruited or practiced. I disciplined my children and loved them with all my heart. I tried to find what they were good at and allowed them only one activity because of having four children. I remember us playing games like Monopoly and pick up sticks and cards like Uno. Singing songs together. I use to play the piano when I was a child. Two of my daughters also took piano lessons. I wanted music to be a part of my kids lives. I remember our vacations to Hilton Head. The kids diving and finding sand dollars. My son and my daughter tried playing golf. One daughter and son loved soccer and baseball. This daughter actually saved one of her friends life in the pool. This daughter works with aging and is a christian counselor. She works with teenagers at church. The other two were cheerleaders. They were all athletic in some way. One daughter was our entertainer. She loved baby sitting. Until this day she helps those less fortunate than herself and loves her children. She is very creative. One was a great swimmer and a life guard and worked at summer camps as a counselor. She now is in sales and does a great job. She is such a good friend and has a wonderful son. They loved skiing. I use to take them water skiing when they were children and teenagers at a time when we lived on the lake. Water, music, sports, church was a big part of my children's life. I wanted to keep my children in healthy activities. My girls were all in dancing. Not so sure my youngest liked it. She didn't like the recitals or the cute costumes. My son loved skate boarding. I remember trying it myself with him and his friends. My son learned roping from an early age. We travel far for him to rope just 7 seconds. He was the 4th in the country in steer wrestling. He loves farming hemp and his cattle until today. I wanted to teach my children Gods ways as we went about our day.
My children are survivors. They know people. They have taught me a lot about people. They have had lots in their lives and they have had little. They work hard at what they are good at. I see the fruits of their raising in what they are good at as adults. I see the good in all my children of me and their father and even their grandparents. I wish I had known then more of what I know today of being a good mother. My mothering is all of grace and lots of love.
I use to think I wanted to keep my children in a glass bubble. To protect them from pain. It was the way I was raised. I had an ideal childhood. I was so innocent as a young mother. We as mothers are more able to protect our children when our children are young and are under our care but it is unrealistic to think we can protect them all of their lives. Teach your children how to live in a fallen world. We suffer when our children suffer. We rejoice when they rejoice.
One of the things I failed at as a mother was not talking to my children about their fears, their dreams and their goals in life. I did not know as a young mother how to listen to their hearts. This was foreign to me until they became older. I did not know I had the Holy Spirit to help me raise my children. My children helped me with the cooking and the taking care of the younger ones. I thought I was equipping the girls to be good moms and wives and women. My son was born later in life. He was such a joy to me because I was older and had more time to enjoy him as a baby and a young boy. He spent a lot of time on the farm with his dad. He loves it until this day. He is a farmer. Helping his dad. Much changed for my children, especially my son, he was the youngest, when I began to struggle with mental issues. He was the youngest of four sisters. I use to say he had 4 mothers and laugh.
Some of my children, as they became adults have cared for me, when I was sick. I have caused all my children more pain than I want to admit, during that time. They have care for me. We have all learned to love and forgive each other. This is the beauty of the Gospel. The gift of repentance and faith. Agreeing with God that you are wrong and accept His and others forgiveness. Maybe sharing how they have hurt you.
Being a mother is a sacrifice. It is being willing to let your children be mad at you. It is pointing them to the one perfect parent God. Who helps us in raising our children. It is trusting in God to be faithful in the lives of your children. Being used by God to build His Kingdom is no greater calling for a woman. God brought value to all women in the bible as we see mothers and women being used in major ways in the bible and in precious relationships with Jesus. Jesus honored, loved and cared for His own mother even until His death on the cross. This is how much God loves using women to care for His creation.
There is only one Perfect Parent and it is God, our Father. God is shaped in our children's lives first by the kind of parent we are both Father and Mother. Teaching our children God is a loving Father who also corrects us is a good beginning. He breaks down walls to come after us. He is jealous for our hearts. But at the same time is patient and kind and long suffering with us. He also rejoices when we rejoice. He weeps when we weep. He wants our trust and we have His unconditional love. He is the one Person who knows us fully but loves us completely. It was the Father who gave His only Son that we might come into His family of love. What amazing love is this!
I miss my own, wonderful Mom, this Mothers Day especially! I wish I had lived closer and had more time with her after my children were born. We all did the best we could. She had such a positive affect on my life and the lives of my children. I see a lot of my parents giftedness in my children and now even in me. May I be such a mem to my own grandchildren, whom I love dearly.
I hope you have had a Happy Mothers Day ladies. Remembering the good in your own mother or the woman who raised you. Love your world well...
