My Drug of Choice

co-dependency use to be my drug of choice. For instance if my husband was happy I was happy. If someone approved of what I was doing or saying it was ok then. I was a people pleaser. Keep the peace. Don't cause or contribute to conflict. This is how I responded from everything just keep the peace and try to keep everyone happy. This is not possible. Guilt and shame and anger kept me going around in circles. I reacted any way I could to keep these three things quieted deep with in my heart.

Now I don't need their approval. I can love them instead. I listen to God, through His Spirit, to lead my way. I can hear that still small voice saying go this way. He directs my path.

Scripture says if you are a pleaser of man you cannot please God. I am ok no matter what my circumstances or who is upset with me. I can try to solve the issue but it does not determine my peace and joy. God does.

Now I ask God about everything. He is my constant companion. I talk to Him throughout my day. He is with me no matter where I go. I can lean on Him no matter what. He is my Savior and my Lord.

It is a freedom I have found to love others but first of all to Love God. My life is surrendered to Him daily. Oh I fail many times. But like the prodigal Son I know the way back home and my Father is running toward me with open arms. He welcomes me back with a party.